By: Carol (A Member of EASE Meditation)
Once meditation becomes a part of your life, it’s hard to imagine not doing it. It’s hard to imagine how I survived before meditation. I have learned so much since I began this journey and yet I have so much to learn still. This blog is really to relate my own experience, to just say what I know has worked for me. Hopefully some of it will ring true for others and be of some help.
Getting Started with Meditation
Letting go of my accumulated baggage was the first step to healing myself and my relationship. The first day that I woke up feeling free was the day that I finally understood that I was not responsible for making the people in my life happy, just as they weren’t responsible for making me happy! The only person who’s happiness I am responsible for is my own. We all feel and respond according to who we are, there is no prescribed way to be.
Once I had let go of the idea that I could somehow control the emotions or thoughts of the ones I care about, life suddenly seemed so much easier, it was as though a huge weight had lifted. You do have the right to expect that people who care about you won’t betray your trust and hurt you, but it’s not reasonable to get upset when those same people don’t live up to your expectations, when in all likelihood they don’t have any idea what your expectations are! Why would they? And why should we believe that there is a prescribed way to live? Every person sees life differently
Love Them For Who They Are
Everyone is their own inner self, no matter what else happens around them. Focus on appreciating the people in your life. Don’t bring them down, not even in your own thoughts. Learn to see people as perfect just the the way they are, don’t judge, I really mean it….don’t judge. Love their eccentricities, love the richness of having them in your life. The strange thing about discovering this was that I began to see myself the same way. I began to like myself the way I am.
The other significant change in my life is my relationship with my partner. I would describe us in the past as quite volatile in the way we related to one another. I always felt that this was just the price you pay for being in a very “passionate”, but satisfying relationship, as I saw it. In retrospect, I think to some extent this was true. We both always felt very powerfully connected to one another and a lot of the intensity came from a kind of fear of losing one another. The adrenaline however was killing us.
Finding Peace with Meditation
Meditation gave me a way to return to myself, to become a separate person again. I found an inner peace, a strength at my very core. The fear has gone and with it many other issues have just faded away. I no longer lie awake at night and obsess over the things that didn’t go the way they should have, or the things that may or may not happen in the future. I can live in the present and be present, I can appreciate, the people in my life and everything around me just the way it is.
To understand more about the experiences I have had through meditation, please read my next blog.